I was on the internet the other day, browsing and carousing, when I came across this site: http://leechesturkey.com/
For those of you who don't want to bother looking at the site, it's a company that imports leeches (that are collected without "handtouch") from Turkey to the states for medical uses. Now I'm sure you must thinking about running out and getting some for yourself right now, but allow me to point out a few things about the site first.
Apparently, they have the knowledge to know what the importance of a local vasodilator is, but they don't speak English too well, making for some of my favorite phrases ever, like "Leeches Turkey: Attach importance to your healt" and "This animals are Medicial Miracle!" They sure have a way with words!
Also, they have a wicked cool banner at the top that displays an artsy rendition of a couple of leeches and a picture some women sporting snappy-smart business suits while talking on the cell phone. If you don't hear that screaming professional, then you are deaf.
Lastly they have a section of photos with these leeches in action, demonstrating their actual utility. Flipping through those pictures got me thinking: Our country could do with a little bloodletting!
We just need to get some leeches to the parts of our country that have economically or culturally atrophied and surely the emergency increase of flow to those sections will bring them back to life.
The best thing about it is, we already have the leeches, all we need do is relocate them.
Imagine the good it would do to relocate the top faces of the RIAA to the darkest depths of urban society, or to put a rapper into the heart of the deep south. Or perhaps we can move Bill O'Riley to the mid west! Picture this: Hollywood stars and coked out starlets sucking at the veins that bring life to cities with poor cultural health, like Houston, where the people only have the 80s to celebrate. The potential for make increase of Unites States "healt" is endless! This peoples are Cultrual Miracle!
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