Monday, July 28, 2008

Good News for Frat Boy Animal Lovers

So a recent discovery of a mammal in a rain forest has prompted my most recent excursion from blogging hibernation. For as long as groups of guys have been getting together in the name of community service to drink alcohol and take advantage of girls all while paying to be part of some fraternal order, the question of pets has been a concern. How can a guy that is so busy being a miscreant have time to care for another animal? Well, the answer is here. . . the pentail tree shrew.

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=93001529&ft=1&f=1001

The fraternal brother no longer has to worry about remembering to feed his special little guy. No, his other special little guy. Rohibnol takes care of Willy the Wonder Worm's needs. So this niffty little primate feeds off of alcohol. How convenient is that? Very I say.

But leave it to the Frat Boy to ruin everything that is good, like playing a guitar to get into a girl's panties. Such would be the case with the beer guzzling midget monkey, right? If only it could be taught to fetch stray beer pong balls. And all the sorority girls will think it is just the cutest. "Oozy boozy woozy. You are just a cute little fella, huh?" And, "You must be so sensitive to have such an innocent little pet" (girls don't like sensitive guys though, according to pain staking field studies).

Ok, sorry. Back to hibernation.

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