Oprah

My girlfriend is going on the Oprah Vegan Cleanse. I started to think about it and I was going to write a post about Oprah. I was going to talk about the fact that, though she seems well meaning, she has de facto control over the behavior of millions of women. That scares me.

This scares me on many levels.

1. She is controlling women, who we know are all crazy. (All men are idiots, so no complaints ladies. In fact, if you complain now, you only prove my point)

2. She has no true rival to balance her voice and power. The U.S. had the USSR, Batman has the Joker. A powerful force has to have an equal power to define them, other wise they drift off into areas they need not be in, like the U.S. after the fall of Russia. Where is Oprah’s Russia?

3. She has decided meat is morally reprehensible. Think about what happens when millions of women decide meat is murder. Women are 54% of the population. They decide every election. As soon as they got the vote Alcohol was banned for a decade.

Just saying.

Where was I…right why Oprah scares me.

4. She is nice and has good intentions. We all know what the road to hell is paved with bricks of "good intentions" and Skittles. That is a little known fact, good intentions and Skittles make a great pavement.

5. Arnold managed to swing terrible action movies into a governorship, what will Oprah do with her much greater influence, become Galactic Empress?

I was going to write all that, but as I started, I remembered, she could have me killed. So I didn’t write this.

For your own well being, you didn’t read this.

K Tuttle.